ayuni
Music: LVNDR
I Don't Believe In Love
Assalamualaikum :-)
Jumpa lagi. Apa khabar ? Sihat ? Dah makan ? I'm currently busy with homework but I still make some time for my poor blog. After this I will hurriedly go and finish the Math works. I don't even have a time for myself. I'm very busy and I don't even know it. I rarely eat at home and often locked myself in my room alone to finish the homework but still there is one that I forgot to check. How can I have myself prepared when I even forgot about homeworks ? So I decided to double the check. I would check on my homework twice and sometimes more.
This night is cold. Even I don't know why. Is my life will end here ? That's all that I would think now. Are now is the right time to go ? To let everything and go to Him ? To leave everything and be with Him ? But nobody ever answered the question for me. Sometimes I felt like I'm alone in this world even I have a lot of friends and person that is by my side. I don't know why I felt like that. I've never been like this. And sometimes I felt like it's better to leave my friends and go to Him. Why ? Because He is the One that makes myself. He is the one that understood me. Why ? Because He is my favourite company when I'm alone. When my hearts felt like something is ripping it apart.
Why do he makes me like this ? I don't want to love him again. Everytime I saw him laughing I would laugh alone. By just seeing his smile I smile too. I don't want to remembered him again because they said Time will heal the love and I believed that even I don't believed such thought this time. My heart said he is hurting but I saw him laughing and I'm fine as long as he is like that too. My mind keeps telling me to forget me and open a new chapter and make a new book that will write a colourful beatiful story for my life. My decision now is too follow my mind to make a new book with a colourful beautiful story in it without the word Love.
세상에 무릎 꿇지 않도록… 난 믿어요 세상엔 아직 사랑이 가득 하죠…
This world is to cruel for me. To let me fell in love. To let me cry because a man. To let me wipe my tears alone. To let me get back on my own. To let me stand up and be a better person. Why do this world believe me to do this thing ? This cruel world knew that I'm weak. I'm horrible person without an acknowledge to get things back in its way. This world knews it but it still forced me to make it. And be a stupid person I do it.
I stand back to turn things back and replaced the horrible world with awesome. To throw the stupid and replaced it with smart. To wipe the tears and replaced it with smile. How did it know that it will work on me ? Now, I will open a new book with awesome words written in it and I will open my eyes to look for a better side of my new chapter of life. I will not let my lips to say love by itself. It will when it's time to.
I will believe in myself. I will carry my new book and travel to every edge of the world with this new book. The unimportant things that will be my wounds will heal through time. As time passes, this wounds will replaced with new things that will make my chapters interesting. Curious about the new chapters ? Stay tuned. Don't stop reading my chapter of life because it will be interesting. I promise.
Assalamualaikum . Annyeong Sehun-ah ^^
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